You’ve probably seen the famous quotation by Mahatma Gandhi, “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” While it’s pretty obvious that we can’t expect things to change if we’re not prepared to do anything about changing ourselves, it’s worth knowing the story behind Gandhi’s insight.

Among the hundreds of people were waiting to visit with Mahatma Gandhi one day were a mother and her young son. When it was their turn, the woman asked Gandhi to speak with her son about eating so much sugar. Gandhi asked her to come back in two weeks and said he would talk to the boy then. She wondered why he didn’t just speak to her son when he was already there, but she complied with his request. In two weeks they returned, and after waiting for a couple of hours she was able to approach Gandhi once again. He spoke with the boy, who agreed to begin reducing the amount of sweets he was eating. After thanking Gandhi for his wise and compassionate words, the mother asked him why he asked them to return rather than offering his advice at their first meeting. Gandhi replied, “When you visited two weeks ago I realised that I too was eating too much sugar. How could I ask anyone else to do something I wasn’t prepared to do myself?”

Each one of us has the opportunity to make a difference to our own lives, the quality of our relationships, and to the world, improving things one choice, one decision, one action at a time. Being older doesn’t exempt or excuse us from personal responsibility; there are very few issues where we can honestly say “that’s nothing to do with me.” If anything our lifetime’s wisdom and experience should encourage us to take more personal responsibility for ourselves and others, not less. The bottom line is that if you want things to change you must start with yourself. Whatever changes you would like to effect within your family and in your society have to begin with you. It’s that simple and it’s that profound.